Vincent D'Onofrio's Directorial Debut The Kid Is A Forgettable Trip To The West

Back in the early 1990s, Unforgiven was like a shot heard 'round the world for Westerns as it provided a more contemplative take on the once-omnipresent genre that saw Clint Eastwood do a realistic deconstruction of his fabled Man With No Name persona. Since then, most Westerns have used Unforgiven as a creative touchstone, especially in terms of being more conscious of the gruesome violence that transpired in the Old West compared to many classic Westerns. Such widespread imitations of Unforgiven have meant that the elements of Unforgiven that were once trailblazing are now themselves old hat. By contrast, the best recent Westerns have been films like Rango, True Grit and Slow West that have established their own unique identities rather than do their own variation on the somber contemplative mood of Unforgiven for the umpteenth time.

The LEGO Movie 2 Works Well As An Allegory, Less So As A Comedy

Considering how many modern-day American computer-animated movies primarily concentrate on how much dabbing, celebrity voice-overs and Minions going "BANANA!!" they can shove into their runtime, it feels like declaring that the biggest problem with The LEGO Movie 2: The Second Part is that it leans too heavily on its central allegory at the expense of humor should be a compliment disguised as a critique. Can something like The Emoji Movie even spell allegory, let alone execute one? But The LEGO Movie 2: The Second Part, though not devoid of entertainment, does feel like a movie so wrapped up in its central allegory that its attempts at humor feel more obligatory rather than actually entertaining.

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom Is The Cinematic Equivalent To Kid Rock's All Summer Long

I sure do hope anyone who goes to see Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is familiar with every little detail of the original Jurassic Park film because this movie is obsessed to a creepy degree with homaging that particular entry in the franchise. All kinds of nostalgic fan-service moments crop up throughout the story, ranging from an appearance by the cane topped by an ambered mosquito that John Hammond once carried around to an appearance by the flipped over Jurassic Park van that fell into the T-Rex paddock to a comically extraneous cameo appearance by Dr. Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum). Colin Trevorrow and Derek Connolly pack their dismal script with all kinds of references to the original, a task they become so preoccupied with that they forget to make all that much that is unique or interesting for this brand new Jurassic Park adventure.

In Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2, The Cosmic Weirdness, Fun And Interesting Characters Are In Full Supply!

The Marvel Cinematic Universe has done a lot of things right, but man, it took 'em a while to get a handle on doing their second movies in individual franchises right. Their first one of these specific type of features, Iron Man 2, is still by far the weakest and most narratively messy MCU film while their next effort in this area was Thor: The Dark World, a heavily flawed fantasy movie with some elements of fun scattered throughout. Right after Thor: The Dark World, they finally got one of these movies right with Captain America: The Winter Soldier and continued that trend with the gonzo yet thoughtful Avengers: Age Of Ultron. Now, you may be pondering to yourself right now, is Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 more on the order of Iron Man 2 or Captain America 2?

Passengers Is A Bumpy Ride

WARNING: Like Collateral Beauty from a few weeks ago, Passengers is a movie whose marketing has outright lied to audiences by concealing the actual plot of the movie its advertising. To talk about the movie in any way shape or form, I'll have to talk about very basic plot elements introduced from the get-go in the movie that are only spoilers because the ads for Passengers have concealed them from viewers. OK? Okee-dokee, onto the review!

It's nice that Passengers has a polished look to it in terms of production design. The spaceship the two lead characters inhabit is nicely brought to life by way of some solid looking sets and I enjoy that the various technological marvels to be found on the ship are treated in the same way Futurama and Star Wars treated their own futuristic gizmo's; as everyday nuisances, in the same way we might gripe about an iPad mildly malfunctioning despite such a device being unthinkable to exist even as late as a decade ago. That's a unique enough approach that also leads to some brief diversions into dark humor that I wish Passengers had utilized more instead of just dipping its toes into the waters of mildly dark humor two or three times.

The Magnificent Seven Is The First Modern-Day MGM Remake That's Actually Good

MGM, in their post-bankruptcy state, has been going through their library of titles and remaking everything so exhaustively, it'd be amazing if the remakes typically weren't so forgettable. A RoboCop remake came and went without any fanfare and (like most moviegoers) I never even saw their Poltergeist and Ben-Hur remakes. Before the studio embarks on a Death Wish remake starring Bruce Willis that'll start filming at the end of the month, we have their latest remake of a well-known MGM from decades past (with the original film itself being a remake of Akira Kurosawa's Seven Samurai), The Magnificent Seven.

Denzel Washington Is On Horseback, Emily Blunt Is On A Train And Brian De Palma Is On Display In This Batch Of New Movie Trailers

Just as the sun sets, the rivers flow and David DeCoteau directs eight feature films a year, another inevitability has occurred today; new movie trailers have descended from the heavens to deliver new footage of films you may or may not see in the coming months. That's less of a question for me though, I'll almost certainly see all three of these movies. I mean, I saw Fifty Shades Of Black in its theatrical run for Christs sake. At this point, I'll just wander the Earth for the remainder of my days, watching any movie that crosses my path in an attempt sear the memory of films like Sucker Punch from my brain.

Anywho, with that bout of existentialism out of the way, let's look at four new movie trailers!

This Deleted Scene From Jurassic World Is One Big Pile Of....Well, Y'Know

Last night, a deleted scene from Jurassic World began to take the internet by storm, and it's not hard to see why. This wasn't just a bunch of sites dedicated to cinema using the title of the biggest movie of 2015 to generate more pageviews, this was a scene omitted from the final cut from Jurassic World so utterly bizarre I can't imagine what compelled the four screenwriters attached to the movie (among them the features director Collin Trevorrow) to ever think it belonged in this thing.

The scene in question has been taken off of YouTube, but basically, it depicts Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard) and Owen (Chris Pratt) after they've set off to find Claire's nephews who are lost in the park. In order to avoid detection by the various dinos (some of which like to munch on humans), Owen suggests that he and Claire smear dinosaur feces on their bodies. While Owen simply gets some of the stuff on his arms, Claire covers her legs and chest in droppings. Her applying the stuff to her body is depicted in the same fashion lotion commercials depict women rubbing lotion on their various body parts i.e. in a manner that's meant to be alluring.

Continuing the tradition of the Jurassic Park films having at least one scene dedicated to dinosaur droppings (only The Lost World: Jurassic Park bucked this trend, though the rest of the movie was crappy enough to make up for that omission), this scene seems like one that would have sent the movies intense tone careening off into oblivion as well as continuing the entire features troubling gender politics. Claire can't just rub the crap (literally!) onto her arms like Owen, she has to do it in a weirdly seductive manner. It also appears like this scene attempts to establish the first time where Owen begins to rekindle his romantic feelings for Claire, and I'm not quite sure if this is worse than the way the final cut of Jurassic World handled the duos relationship, which culminated in a Man Of Steel-esque kiss while innocent civilians are being plucked by pterodactyls.

Some Thoughts On The Jurassic World Trailer

I love nothing more than a fun surprise, and getting the trailer for Jurassic World two whole days early certainly fits into that category. The first time footage from the feature had been shown, this was the world's first glimpse into what's to come for the beloved franchise. If the first trailer is any indication, we're all in for a treat come next summer.

A Tetris Movie Is Actually Happening And I Have An Idea For The Films Plot

Video games haven't exactly had the bets success being translated into film, but over the next few years, a resurgence of video game features will try to get more high-quality features in that particular genre created. The likes of Assassins Creed, Angry Birds and World of Warcraft will be brought to the big screen, and now Tetris can be added to the slate of upcoming films based on video games.

Guardians of The Galaxy Review

Glorious Guardians Guarantee Greatness

OH ITS SO GLORIOUS

We've seen a lot of amazing adventures from the Marvel Cinematic Universe, the interlocking film series that includes the Iron Man, Thor, Captain America and Avengers films (it also includes the singular The Incredible Hulk). They've changed the face of cinema in recent years, with The Avengers encouraging every movie studio and their grandma to enter the business of creating franchises that constantly crossover into each other. The only one to emerge so far (though the Universal Monster movies are the next up to follow this tactic) was The Amazing Spider-Man 2, which ditched coherent storytelling in favor of setting up endless amounts of sequels.

The Expendables 3 Fire Away A New Trailer Filled With Mel Gibson Antics

These character posters just befuddle me, especially
since Gibson seems to be the only actor in character

Last years Machete Kills was dumb enough enough in many respects to make an average Adam Sandler feature look complex, but its sense of fun was infectious enough to make it a watchable outing. Much of the fun came from Gibsons hammy turn as a villain who had cosmic ambitions, a role the actor wouldn't have even considered prior to his anti-Semitic controversies. Now, Gibson continues to pay homage to his heydays in the 80's as an action stars by being the maniacal baddie in The Expendables 3. The new trailer gives him and the films numerous cast members time to shine, so check it out below.