Tuesday, September 24, 2019

In Laman's Terms: Ranking Every Single DreamWorks Animation Movies From Worst to Best (PART ONE)


In Laman's Terms is a new weekly editorial column where Douglas Laman rambles on about certain topics or ideas that have been on his mind lately. Sometimes he's got serious subjects to discuss, other times he's just got some silly stuff to shoot the breeze about. Either way, you know he's gonna talk about something In Laman's Terms!

Twenty-one years after releasing their first movie, DreamWorks Animation is a household name for a variety of reasons. Perhaps it's because your kids love their movies. Perhaps it's because you have nostalgia for the likes of The Road to El Dorado and Shrek. Perhaps you hate how so many DreamWorks characters make the same facial expression. Perhaps you're just a Bee Movie Meme connoisseur. Whatever the reason, we all know about DreamWorks Animation, but how often do we actually contemplate the studios library of titles? The folks at this animation studio have produced thirty-six movies over the last twenty-one years and over the course of two In Laman's Terms editorial columns this week, I'll be ranking all of these films from worst to best.

Get ready to blare All-Star and for an avalanche of celebrity voice-over performances, we're about to dive into the DreamWorks Animation library. Let's start with the studios worst title, which could only be...



36. Shrek the Third (dir. Raman Hui & Chris Miller, 2007)
It's really not hard to pick this as the worst of the bunch when it comes to all of DreamWorks Animation's feature films. Somehow the complete lack of Smash Mouth music is the least of this movie's problems. Whereas the first two Shrek movies had such enjoyable energy to them, Shrek the Third is just robotically going through the motions. Fatigued gags about a medieval High School and a princess baby shower elicit yawns rather than laughs. The stilted voice acting, particularly a phoned-in performance from franchise newcomer Justin Timberlake, only compounds how tired this whole project is. DreamWorks Animation has had its fair share of crummy movies but none of them are as lazily put-together as Shrek the Third.
35. Shrek Forever After (dir. Mike Mitchell, 2010)
If Shrek the Third got sunk by an overdose of bad comedy, Shrek Forever After gets sunk by an overdose of bad sentimentality. As the "final chapter" in the series, Shrek Forever After wants to wrap up the story on a poignant note that will make the When Somebody Loved Me sequence from Toy Story 2 look like an emotional cakewalk. All the effort just results in a bunch of schmaltz and no actual poignancy. One can't help but wonder, as the movie goes on, where all the fun and energy in this series went, where did the creativity go? Failed attempts to drum up tears are occasionally interrupted by tepid attempts at humor. Only Walt Dohrn's gung-ho vocal performance as Rumpelstiltskin has any sort of life in it this go-around, otherwise, Shrek Forever After ends a once delightfully irreverent story on a sappy note. 
34. Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa (dir. Eric Darnell & Tom McGrath, 2008)
Speaking of poor attempts at sentimentality in a DreamWorks Animation sequel, Madagascar: Escape 2 African brings its four lead characters to Africa and finds very little entertainment in the process. The first Madagascar was nothing exceptional but it found its best moments in off-beat wacky humor. Escape 2 Africa placing so much emphasis on an attempt to wring pathos out of the strained relationship between Alex the Lion (Ben Stiller) and his Dad (Bernie Mac) just doesn't work, the audience isn't emotionally invested in Alex nearly enough to make this story as moving as it should be. A story structure that separates the four lead characters for a bunch of scattered plotlines and a crop of forgettable new characters (one of whom is played by Alec Baldwin in the first of his three DreamWorks Animation roles) ensure that Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa ends up as one of the weaker DreamWorks Animation movies.
33. Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas (dir. Patrick Gilmore & Tim Johnson, 2003)
The last hand-drawn animated feature from DreamWorks Animation did not send the studios time in this artform out on a high note. An action-adventure starring Brad Pitt as the titular lead, Sinbad throws a lot of monsters and action at the viewer but never manages to come up with something that actually leaves a lasting impression. So much of it just feels so derivative of other movies, there's just so little in the way of originality to be found here, particularly in tired romance subplot between Sinbad and Lady Marina (Catherine Zeta-Jones). Plus, the hand-drawn elements and computer-animated elements don't gel well here at all, a far cry from the likes of Treasure Planet who could fuse the two artforms together seamlessly. DreamWorks Animation totally needs to bring back hand-drawn animation feature films, but hopefully they end up being of better quality than Sinbad.


32. Penguins of Madagascar (dir. Eric Darnell & Simon J. Smith, 2014)
Those four penguins from the Madagascar movies were always good for a laugh or two as supporting characters, but headlining their own movie, the joke gets stretched beyond the breaking point by the time the half-hour mark gets hit. So many computer-animated movies have already done spy movie pastiches that Penguins was gonna need some really witty humor to make their own lampooning of the genre stand out. Unfortunately, creativity on this project seems to have begun and ended with the admittedly fun casting of Benedict Cumberbatch and John Malkovich as a suave wolf and a dastardly octopus, respectively. Penguins of Madagascar is bereft of entertaining comedy and truly overstays its welcome. May this one serve as a warning sign that some animated movie supporting characters should stay as supporting characters.
31. Shark Tale (dir. Eric "Bibo" Bergeron, Vicky Jenson & Rob Letterman, 2004)
Ah, Shark Tale, The Olympus Has Fallen to Finding Nemo's White House Down. This movie's quintessential DreamWorks in a lot of ways; lots of celebrity voice-overs, a bevy of pop culture references (there's one part where Will Smith's protagonist fish just begins rattling off famous movie quotes) and a smattering of bathroom humor to boot. A few jokes do land, namely anything involving a shrimp, but this is a surprisingly forgettable affair despite the fact that it features Martin Scorsese as a pufferfish. When you're so busy straining to be hip like Shark Tale constantly is, you tend to forget to come up with a compelling story and boy does Shark Tale lack anything resembling an interesting story.
30. Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron (dir. Kelly Asbury & Lorna Cook, 2002)
There's a number of moments in Spirit that indicate this production had ambitions of being a Western Bambi. The final product evokes Bambi II more than Bambi, though, mostly because this story of a horse named Spirit (who speaks through narration provided by Matt Damon) keeps undercutting its attempts at more thoughtful storytelling with super on-the-nose elements meant to make it clear exactly what the horse protagonist is thinking at all times. Instead of just letting the subtle details of the animation do the talking, Matt Damon is on hand to both explain the lead character's thoughts and provide stale gags (including a hacky horse version of a "Women, amirite?" joke). There's also a barrage of terrible Bryan Adams songs containing humorously obvious lyrics referencing whatever situation Spirit in experiencing on-screen. Even the occasionally pretty animation can't fulfill its fullest potential since the hand-drawn horses do not mix well at all with the poorly-realized computer-animation backgrounds. Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron should have trusted its bolder storytelling ambitions instead of leaning so heavily on poor Bryan Adams songs.
29. Home (dir. Tim Johnson, 2015)
Boy, I totally forget this one even exists and it's not hard to see why. A classic example of DreamWorks shoving in a popular celebrity to headline one of their movies, Jim Parsons plays an excitable version of Sheldon Cooper in the role of alien Oh who must team up with a little girl played by Rihanna to save Earth. The half-hearted celebrity voice-over work isn't the only part of this project that's lacking, the aliens have unimaginative designs that make them look like cousins of the Minions while the friendship between the two leads is hard to get invested in, mostly because the character of Oh gets quite grating quite fast. At least Home offered up a rare chance for a woman of color to headline a big DreamWorks Animation blockbuster, that's neat, but that's the only real noteworthy part of...what was this movie called again?
28. Monsters vs. Aliens (dir. Rob Letterman & Conrad Vernon, 2009)
Deciding to render the human characters in this homage to schlocky 1950s/1960s monster movies through the stylized prism of how human caricatures looked in classic issues of MAD Magazine is a pretty inspired idea. The execution of that idea leaves plenty to be desired. Instead of fully embracing this idea, Monsters vs. Aliens just puts contorted faces onto a few characters who are otherwise designed like typical DreamWorks Animation human characters. It's a half-hearted visual effort for a similarly half-hearted movie. The celebrity voice-overs in this one really do seem to be trying their best to lift up this lifeless material (Hugh Laurie has his moments as Dr. Cockroach, as does Seth Rogen as B.O.B.) but a wacky concept like monsters fighting an army of aliens really deserved a more lively execution than this. Couldn't they at least have executed those stylized humans better?
27. Mr. Peabody & Sherman (dir. Rob Minkoff, 2014)
Much like Monsters vs. Aliens, Mr. Peabody & Sherman attempted to replicate a mid-20th-century hand-drawn animation style in computer animation. This time around, it was the character designs of Jay Ward's original animated cartoons from the 1960s. Much like Monsters vs. Aliens, though, Mr. Peabody & Sherman got tripped up by not deviating far enough away from typical DreamWorks Animation character designs, which left the attempted visual homage heavily lacking in execution. The rest of the movie is pretty forgettable overall as it tries to stretch this time-traveling dog & human son dynamic into a feature film. Some amusing gags do emerge and it's got a somewhat more timeless quality to it than some other DreamWorks titles, but little of it sticks around in your mind once the credits stop rolling. Like its animation style, Mr. Peabody & Sherman as a movie seems to have been made with reasonably good intentions that resulted in a forgettable effort.
26. The Boss Baby (dir. Tom McGrath, 2017)
Director Tom McGrath has shown a constant love for the stylized animation found in classic Looney Tunes cartoons throughout his DreamWorks directorial efforts, which include the Madagascar trilogy and The Boss Baby. The latter title does get some humorous moments from its wacky animation but for the most part, The Boss Baby settles for more forgettable attempts at laughs that help to ensure this one ends up on the lacking side of DreamWorks Animation productions. Attempts at pathos between the titular character and his older brother fall flat and Alec Baldwin's lead vocal performance, though fun, is the only real noteworthy voicework in the film. This could have been worse though, originally Kevin Spacey was supposed to play the villain in The Boss Baby.
25. Turbo (dir. David Soren, 2013)
Why is a movie with starring a super-speedy snail (one voiced by Ryan Reynolds to boot) so boring and down-to-Earth? Turbo should really be the most cartoony DreamWorks Animation of them all with its lead character being a snail who becomes as fast as an automobile. To be fair, the voice cast (primarily comprised of character actors like Paul Giamatti, Maya Rudolph and Michael Pena, in a welcome change of pace) does try to lend the proceedings a zippy air. But the film's script opts for a more predictable underdog sports movie execution of its central storyline and making the animation covered in bleak colors and shadows. Trying to make the lead character work in those confines proves to be a fatal mistake, as seen by a super contrived climax where Bill Hader's nefarious Formula 1 racer villain tries to drag his car across the finish line to beat out the titular protagonist. It's a scene played totally straight-faced despite being so ridiculous that it makes Bee Movie look as realistic as a Yasujiro Ozu movie. If only Turbo had leaned into fun wackiness instead of being so intent in racing in formulaic lanes.
24. Trolls (dir. Walt Dohrn & Mike Mitchell, 2016)
Trolls has some of the best animation seen in any DreamWorks Animation effort. The world these tiny critters inhabit looks like what would happen if a Hobby Lobby exploded, scrapbook materials are used to bring this gorgeous world to life and the color scheme of this domain has a trippy psychedelic quality to it. All the creativity went into the pretty images, though, because the rest of Trolls is pretty paint-by-numbers. The pop songs chosen for the characters to song are primarily standard needle drops you've heard in a million movies before and the characters are usually more irritating than loveable. If you watch Trolls on mute, I bet it's a fun experience. Turn the sound up at all, though, and you'll wish the lead characters would go back to Nilbog or wherever they came from.


23. Bee Movie (dir. Steve Hickner & Simon J. Smith, 2007)
Yes, we all love the Bee Movie mess, they're as delightful as they are mystifying. But we're talking about the movie itself, not the memes, and Bee Movie is a feature livened up by some moments of true blue lunacy for sure. What other animated kids movie features a Winnie the Pooh caricature getting taken out by a sniper? Unfortunately, the plot is an episodic snooze, individually, the assorted plotlines are really out-there, but pieced together into a traditional film narrative, they're only intermittently entertaining. Remember, this is despite the fact that a good chunk of the film focuses on a Jerry Seinfeld bee being attracted to a human woman voiced by Renne Zellweger. A really dumb finale involving an airplane (what is with DreamWorks bug movies and contrived climaxes?) caps off the movie in an underwhelming fashion despite some admittedly choice moments that do make for solid meme fodder. The only question that remains now is..."Ya like jazz?"
22. MegaMind (dir. Tom McGrath, 2010)

An attempt to do for superhero movies what Shrek did for fairy tales, MegaMind is a satirical take on the superhero movie genre centered on the titular supervillain (voiced by Will Ferrell) who tries to train a new superhero rival to disastrous results. Whereas Shrek was a direct response to then-recent animated Disney fare from the 90s, MegaMind opts to lampoon almost exclusively the Superman mythos. I love Superman, but it does feel weird that MegaMind didn't try and take on more recent superhero movies to lampoon, especially since its attempts to specifically parody Superman: The Movie (like in a Marlon Brando caricature) have already been done to death. On the plus side, some of the character designs are interesting and McGrath proves to be solid at directing large-scale superhero action sequences. MegaMind is never as bad the nastiest supervillain but it frequently feels like it isn't living up to its fullest potential.

21. The Road to El Dorado (dir. Eric "Bibo" Bergeron & Don Paul, 2000) 
Another DreamWorks Animation effort better in pieces than as a whole. The dynamic between the two lead characters, voiced by Kevin Kline and Kenneth Branagh, is actually quite fun and a unique take on the animated kids movie buddy comedy routine. Usually, such dynamics focus on two characters meeting for the first time whereas the two protagonists of El Dorado have known each other forever once the film stars. This means there's a lived-in quality to their interactions that tends to be a hoot. Unfortunately, a funny rapport between lead characters can only do so much when the rest of the movie registers as merely "passable" at best. The eventual story turns out to be predictable, the songs aren't memorable and the villain is totally forgettable. The Road to El Dorado has some fun lead characters, but the movie they headline just isn't very memorable.
20. Antz (dir. Eric Darnell & Tim Johnson, 1998) 
The first DreamWorks Animation movie released to the public (for reasons that were totally not at all related to a PIXAR movie opening around the same time) is a pretty bold piece of filmmaking among animated kids movies in the 1990s. It's not a musical, adult profanity is used throughout and it's also not afraid to get pretty grisly, particularly in a scene where the lead character Z (Woody Allen) talks to the decapitated head of a fellow ant soldier. There's some real ambition in both of DreamWorks inaugural 1998 movies but unlike its other film from that same year, Antz gets bogged down by some major flaws. For one thing, its visual scheme just isn't that interesting and Woody Allen's lead Z character isn't a fun character in his own right, it's a protagonist relying almost exclusively on the supposed thrill of seeing Woody Allen voice an ant that it forgets to give Z much of his own distinct personality. Contrast that with, say, Po from Kung Fu Panda, who certainly builds upon his voice actors personality, but works on his own if you'd never heard of Jack Black. Still, a movie like Antz with Christopher Walken voicing an evil ant can never be all bad and it's certainly interesting to look back on Antz and see just how vastly different it is from modern DreamWorks fare like The Boss Baby.
19. Madagascar (dir. Eric Darnell & Tom McGrath, 2005)
Another example of a DreamWorks Animation movie with some fun characters trapped in a mixed bag of a movie. Madagascar tends to be at its best when it just lets the oversized personalities in its characters, like those Penguins, Sacha Baron Cohen's King Julien or David Schwimmer's paranoid giraffe, take the reins. Whenever more predictable story elements, like a third act centered on the fractured friendship between Alex the Lion (Ben Stiller) or Marty the Zebra (Chris Rock), take center-stage, that's where the movie becomes more disposable. These characters just work better as vehicles for wacky jokes, not drama we're supposed to get emotionally invested in. Enough of Madagascar is amusing enough to make it a mostly agreeable watch and that joke with the Penguins finally getting to Antarctica still makes me cackle.

Come back on Thursday for the second-part of this series, where we'll look at the top nineteen DreamWorks Animation movies, including the best movie the studio has ever produced! 

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